If i was...

If I was a giant lobster creature
Swimming and living in the sea
I would have lobster-like behavior
And everybody would love me.

If I was a fifty-six inch
Plasma screen TV
I would have crystal clear vision
And everybody would watch me.

If I was a really big flower
I would attract a big bee
It would fly around lots
And be a friend to me.

If I was a radioactive monster
And I had lots and lots of knees
I would wreak a lot of havoc
And the people would hunt me.

If I was a spiky branch
On a big birch tree
I would be promptly cut down
A ladeedee one two and three...